tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25942024764342324592024-03-08T11:03:02.139-08:00GuardYourSpeakwhat we say, why we say it, and why we shouldn't be saying most of itUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2594202476434232459.post-29805161760243019322012-09-04T20:38:00.001-07:002012-09-04T20:38:52.701-07:00Speech is Why We’re Here<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Although the
Gesher HaChaim enumerates no less than thirteen specific attributes that distinguish
human beings from animals, the miracle of speech is the gold standard of that
distinction, and through it man connects to Hashem by way of Limud Torah and
tefillah.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Rabbi Zev Leff
informs us that this use of our faculty of speech for the purposes of learning
Torah and dialoging with Hashem is not incidental.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>At its core, speech is the outward
representation of the Neshama and the means by which one manifests his inner
kedusha. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"></span>It’s all about bringing
out the spiritual potential from our Neshamos through speech by way of Torah and
tefillah.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In this way we build the world
and infuse it with the energy it needs to exist.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">When you crystallize
what’s in your mind it coalesces into a thought that subsequently morphs into
speech which is invariably a catalyst for action.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Simply put, speech
is why we’re here.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Therefore, it
follows that a person who takes speech, whose purpose is to give life, and uses
it instead to tear down people and the world, is abusing the essence of life and turning
it into an agent of death. Loshon Hora vaporizes a person’s claim to
be a human being by destroying that aspect of creation that distinguishes us
from the animals.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Is it any wonder
then that Rav Leff tells us that Loshon Hora is an act of destruction that
he compares to total death? </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">And do we not
also see this in what happened to Miriam when she <i>spoke Loshon Hora</i>
against her brother Moshe, and as a consequence thereof all of her skin turned
white from tzoras?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Why tzoras?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Whereas Loshon
Hora negates a person’s spiritual life and transforms him into a virtual dead
person soul wise, a metzorah, whose flesh is covered from head to toe with
tzoras, represents the physical mirror image of that rotting soul. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Like we said
above, speech is why we’re here.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">And when man puts
that faculty of speech into play to create, by uniting man in the service of
Hashem, he hits the high note of his purpose in this world. </span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2594202476434232459.post-86577452409525628682012-08-21T16:53:00.000-07:002012-08-21T16:53:41.337-07:00The Chofetz Chaim’s Twofer<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">In </span><a href="http://guardyourspeak.blogspot.com/2012/06/dont-even-think-about-it.html">GuardYourSpeak:
Don’t Even Think About It</a>,<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";"> we
mentioned that <i>in the introduction to Sefer Chofetz Chaim the Chofetz Chaim
lists 17 Laveen (negative mitzvos) and 14 Aseen (positive mitzvos) that one
might potentially violate by either speaking or believing loshon hora.
While most of these mitzvos are not about loshon hora per se in their essence,
the Chofetz Chaim tells us that when one crosses the line on loshon hora he may
also be violating one or more of these Aseen or Laveen.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Then in </span><a href="http://guardyourspeak.blogspot.com/2012/07/duck.html">GuardYourSpeak:
Duck!</a>, <span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">we tightened the noose
around the vagueness by jettisoning the word<i> potentially</i>, and then noted
that <i>when you decided to create even the faintest of sound waves that tilted
toward Loshon Hora you empowered the Satan to charge you with violating an
absolute minimum of 6 out of the 17 Laveen and 5 of the 14 Aseen that the
Chofetz Chaim listed in the introduction to his sefer. And for good
measure, you also brought two of the three curses down upon your head.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">For those
without calculators, this works out to a minimum of 11Torah violations for
every comment that crosses the line from what is permitted to what is not, with
two curses thrown in for good measure.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">And one of them
is<i> Do not go tale-bearing about another Jew.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">You told Reuven
what Shimon said about him?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Mazel tov!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The Chofetz Chaim specifically mentions you
by name in his sefer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not the one your
parents gave you when they named you for your great uncle, but the one that
names you for yourself, because the act of placing into Reuven’s ears what came
out of Shimon’s mouth stamped you as a talebearer, for the Chofetz Chaim asks
rhetorically <i>who is a talebearer</i>, and then answers: The one who learns
about things and then goes from place-to-place saying “This is what he said
about you,” or “This is what I heard he did to you.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">And Mr.
Talebearer, if you could fold your cards at this point and slip away quietly
into the night things would be bad enough because the Chofetz Chaim adds that
even if the Rechilus that you spoke is true, your type of language destroys the
world.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">But the truth is
that your situation isn’t <i>bad enough</i> as is.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s actually much worse than that by a long shot
because, ironically enough, the Chofetz Chaim’s very severe indictment of your
loose lips is, comparatively speaking, the good news.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">After informing
us in very severe terms that <i>your type of language destroys the world, </i>the
Chofetz Chaim then tells us that every verbal foray into the nether world of
Rechilus brings <b>even a greater sin</b> in its train which is included in the
of Lav of <i>Do not go tale-bearing about another Jew.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">You told Reuven
what Shimon said about him?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Mazel tov
again!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You have double dipped!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Your remarks degraded a fellow Jew thereby
qualifying them as Loshon Hora, even if they were truthful.</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2594202476434232459.post-82337784260025362022012-07-31T03:56:00.000-07:002012-07-31T03:56:37.532-07:00Duck!<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">In </span><a href="http://guardyourspeak.blogspot.com/2012/07/keep-your-lip-halakhically-zipped.html">GuardYourSpeak:
Keep Your Lip Halakhically Zipped</a>, <span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">we
said that <i>The Beis Din shel Maala….doesn’t give your sins the time of day
UNLESS the Satan, in his role as the prosecuting attorney, brings an accusation
against you, because without an accusation there can be no court case.
And Loshon Hora is the only thing that can point the Satan’s accusative finger
in your direction.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Hashem, in
classic mida keneged mida mode, gave the Satan the power to condemn you based
on your condemnation of other Jews.</span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">That’s already
the good news, because if you thought to assuage either your conscience, your
fear of punishment or both by comforting yourself with the thought that the
itzy bitzy shtickel of Loshon Hora that you said over after davening would be
pareve enough to qualify for the Shemiras HaLoshon version of White Collar criminal
treatment, you thought wrong. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">As we said in </span><a href="http://guardyourspeak.blogspot.com/2012/06/dont-even-think-about-it.html">GuardYourSpeak:
Don’t Even Think About It</a>, <i><span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">in
the introduction to Sefer Chofetz Chaim the Chofetz Chaim lists 17 Laveen
(negative mitzvos) and 14 Aseen (positive mitzvos) that one might potentially
violate by either speaking or believing loshon hora. While most of these
mitzvos are not about loshon hora per se in their essence, the Chofetz Chaim
tells us that when ones crosses the line on loshon hora he may also be
violating one or more of these Aseen or Laveen.</span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">And if that doesn’t
sufficiently lay a mine field through which those who are loose of tongue must
thread their way, the Chofetz Chaim adds 3 Curses from the Torah.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">You opened your
mouth and let loose with a word or two that touched the third rail of Loshon
Hora?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Even if what you
said was only one tenth of a percent Loshon Hora of the most pareve variety
you’re out of luck because when it comes to Loshon Hora, there ain’t no such
thing as pareve.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">In the Satan’s
hands, the impact of <i>he may also be violating one or more of these Aseen or
Laveen</i> in reference to that <i>itzy bitzy shtickel of Loshon Hora that you
said over after davening,</i> coalesces into one heck of a serious indictment
because it appears that
the Holy Chofetz Chaim was actually understating the case when he wrote that <i>he
may also be violating one or more of these Aseen or Laveen</i>.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">The emes is that
there's also no such thing as <i>may also be violating</i>, because the Satan doesn’t walk into court
on the strength of maybes. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">When you decided
to create even the faintest of sound waves that tilted toward Loshon Hora you
empowered the Satan to charge you with violating an absolute minimum of 6 out
of the 17 Laveen and 5 of the 14 Aseen that the Chofetz Chaim listed in the
introduction to his sefer. And for good
measure, you also brought two of the three curses down upon your head.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">And that's just the Satan's default position.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">A good lawyer would tell you to duck because they’re gonna throw the book at you. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2594202476434232459.post-7170324204756106672012-07-25T04:38:00.000-07:002012-07-25T04:38:05.783-07:00Keep Your Lip Halakhically Zipped<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Most of us are
well aware that the bottom line of Loshon Hora is that the Torah forbids
us even to speak the truth about someone if it is denigrating or will cause him
damage.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">But what if you
kept your lip halakhically zipped? Then we are told that the Satan will not
have reshus to speak the truth about you. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Say what? </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Rabbi Mendel
Kessin does yeoman’s service by laying out for us the mechanics of how Loshon
Hora impacts procedurally on the Beis Din shel Maala. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Din (judgment),
he says, is a cause and effect concept.
A person does </span><span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium"; font-size: 14pt;">A
</span><span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">and gets </span><span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium"; font-size: 14pt;">B</span><span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";"> in return. And except for special occasions, Hashem
stays out of the picture and lets the Beis Din shel Maala judge us.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">The fact is that
a Jew can commit multiple sins in the course of a week or even a day, and the
Beis Din doesn’t even so much as throw a glance in his direction.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Why not?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">It’s not as
hefker as it appears because the truth is that this would be considered normal
procedure in any criminal court in the United States. After all, what court is going to concern
itself with the various crimes that abound within its jurisdiction unless and until
they are brought to its attention by the prosecuting attorney representing the
governmental authority? </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">The Beis Din
shel Maala works pretty much the same way, and that’s why it doesn’t give your
sins the time of day UNLESS the Satan, in his role as the prosecuting attorney,
brings an accusation against you, because without an accusation there can be no
court case. And Loshon Hora is the only
thing that can point the Satan’s accusative finger in your direction.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Moreover, Rabbi
Kessin explains that the entire nature of the prosecution is built solely on Loshon
Hora because the Satan is doing nothing less than speaking Loshon Hora about
you. Hashem, in classic mida keneged
mida mode, gave the Satan the power to condemn you based on your condemnation
of other Jews.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Interestingly, there
are also privacy laws in Shomayim but when you speak Loshon Hora they're suspended, and the Satan is
given access to what heretofore was legally out of his reach, and as a
consequence your file of sins is directly laid before him, and he can now immediately
prosecute you. It’s as if you wrote your
own indictment with your tongue for the Satan to sign. It therefore follows that if you don’t speak
Loshon Hora then the Satan can’t speak Loshon Hora about you.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Rabbi Kessin
tells us that even if you discipline your tongue you’ll still be judged,
however, for whatever it was that you either shouldn’t have done or neglected
to do, but the Beis Din shel Maala won’t be able to touch you because if your
tongue is squeaky clean Hashem Himself will judge you. He will give you time to do Teshuva, and even
if you mess that up He will spread out, over a long period of time, whatever
punishment is coming your way.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">And when you’re
one with Hashem there are no rules because He’s all Rachamim and can do
whatever He wants.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">So it all comes
down to this. In relation to the Beis
Din shel Maala, you are nothing more than a ventriloquist because the Satan
can’t open his mouth unless you first open yours, and give him what to
say. And if you don’t, you stroll out of
court past a mute Satan who sits there like a dummy.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">And once you’re
out of there it’s only between you and Hashem.</span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2594202476434232459.post-14079961590531390092012-07-17T20:19:00.000-07:002012-07-17T20:23:16.330-07:00Someone Who Wants To Be Purified<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">The Gemara
(Arachin) teaches us that <i>everyone who speaks Loshon Hora amplifies their
sins and enlarges them until they reach Shomayim.</i> Moreover, as we learn in the Tanna De’Vei
Eliyahu, <i>the </i>(actual) <i>Loshon Hora spoken by a person ascends to the
Heavens, to Hashem’s Holy Throne of Glory.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">In his Preface
to Sefer Chofetz Chaim, Rabbi Yisrael Meir Kagan, who is universally known as
the Chofetz Chaim after his sefer, opens our eyes in regard to the <i>atmospheric
</i>fallout engendered by the speaking of Loshon Hora. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">For starters, he
tells us that the reason <i>that the Torah was so strict with the sin of Loshon
Hora is because the very speaking of Loshon Hora causes the Satan, who is the
Prosecutor against Klal Yisroel, to gain strength and grow in power against us
all.</i> He then brings the Zohar
HaKodesh to let us know that <i>there is a force in the world that is nourished
by those who speak Loshon Hora. Its name
is Sachsuchah and with the impure power that is his by virtue of all of the
Loshon Hora that is spoken, he ascends to the Heavens and spreads death, war,
and catastrophe throughout the world.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">And that’s only
his warm up act.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">The Chofetz
Chaim goes on to tell us that Loshon Hora triggers the attribute of mida
keneged mida (measure for measure) which is one of the modes by which Hashem
brings justice to the world. He once
again cites the Zohar HaKodesh to point out that <i>from this impure power/evil
spirit that we referenced above evolves other forces of strict unmerciful justice.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">You sent a pekel
of some serious Loshon Hora in Hashem’s direction?! </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">That’s really
unfortunate because the bad news is that in <i>the same way that man defiles
his speech with language that is forbidden, he also prevents all of his
subsequent words of holiness (all of his Torah learning and mitzvahs) from
ascending to Heaven.</i> The conclusion
of the Zohar is that all of the good things you have done are suspended in
mid-air.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">They do not
ascend, period.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">The Chofetz
Chaim then impresses upon us the seriousness of this state of affairs by
asking: </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">How will we
merit the coming of Moshiach?</span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">The good news,
however is that the Chofetz Chaim has an answer.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">At the end of
the Preface, after an exhaustive explanation of both the destructiveness of
Loshon Hora and the merits of learning his sefer in order to uproot this great
sin from our midst, the Chofetz Chaim states that <i>if people study these laws
carefully, the Yetzer Hora will not have such great power to control society
into committing this sin. Automatically,
if one backs away from this sin, even a little bit, then as time goes by he
will wash his hands completely of it because this sin is so caught up in the routine
of our everyday lives.</i> The implication
being that if we get a running start vis á vis the sin of Loshon Hora, in due
time we’ll be able to flip the switch on the cruise control.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">The Chofetz
Chaim then hits the high note as he concludes the Preface by letting us hear
that <i>someone who wants to be purified of this sin will have Siyata D’Shemaya
(Divine Assistance), and in the merit of both learning these laws and not
speaking Loshon Hora, Moshiach will come soon,</i> speedily in our days.</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2594202476434232459.post-49003484255946227632012-07-11T08:01:00.000-07:002012-07-11T08:01:28.433-07:00The One Thing<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">In
</span><a href="http://emunahspeak.blogspot.com/2012/01/nothing-but-thoughts.html">EmunahSpeak:
Nothing but Thoughts</a>, <span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Rabbi
Shalom Arush told us in the name of Rebbe Nachman <i>that character traits are
nothing but thoughts, with the prevailing thoughts delineating the essence of
one’s mindset at any given time.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">A
person usually speaks what’s on his mind, so if the prevailing thoughts in one’s
head are grist for the loshon hora mill is there any wonder as to what’s going
to spring forth from between those not so tightly closed lips?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">If
you don’t think it you can’t say it, and if you do think it make sure it’s
squeaky clean.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">In </span><a href="http://guardyourspeak.blogspot.com/2012/06/clarity-of-context.html">GuardYourSpeak:
The Clarity of Context</a>, <span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">we
observed that <i>Whatever you see your neighbor do you also did once upon a
time or may well do tomorrow with but a slight variation on the theme, not
enough to take it out of whatever aveira was the touchstone between your two
neshamos at different points in time.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">And on this we
asked, <i>(so) why is it that there is a Grand Canyon disconnect between the
understanding with which you view your actions and the jaundiced eye that you
cast upon the missteps of your friend, sufficient to ignite within you a desire
to talk about it?</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">The answer, of
course, was that <i>we are more accepting of ourselves because we possess the
clarity that comes from being cognizant of the context from which all of our
mistakes flow, which in turn enhances our understanding of all of our
shortcomings. </i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">But
while context goes a long way in explaining the double standard by which we judge
the actions of others vis á vis our own, it doesn’t go the total route.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">It’s a montage with a wide angle focus that can present us with a myriad of facts
sufficient to morph what was originally nothing but a bare bones sketch into
a high resolution image bursting with detail as to the back story of what it
was that caught our eye. That in turn impacts on what motivated the behavior
that was weighed by us and found wanting.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">But
there are other times where the context of a situation is an open book that's in our face, and it may
not even be a situation in which we are dwelling on yenem’s faults which, as we
said above, will almost invariably lead to loshon hora, while rationalizing our
own. Maybe it’s a case where your <i>friend</i> is, in fact, messing up while you’re
being a big tzaddik.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">There’s
someone in your shul that shows up late every morning about two minutes before
Borchu, and he doesn’t come rushing in either. And it just so happens that you’re the first
one there. You don’t know him that well
but you do know that there’s nothing doing in his house that would slow him up
in the morning. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">The
number of kindred scenarios is only circumscribed by the limits of your
imagination, and it goes without saying that both your mind and tongue should
be focused elsewhere just as it should always be except when there is a
legitimate toellis afoot.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">We’re
talking here about our inability to see past our self imposed delineation of reality.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">In the situations where we are find ourselves bereft of proper context, such as those which we spoke about in </span><a href="http://guardyourspeak.blogspot.com/2012/06/clarity-of-context.html">GuardYourSpeak: The Clarity of Context</a>,
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";"> our tendency, as we said, is to cast a cold eye on the other guy's doings while rationalizing our own miss-steps. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">But on other occasions, when there is a clear distinction in <i>our </i>favor between our
avoda and that of our <i>friend</i>, leaving us nothing to rationalize, it never occurs to us</span><span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";"> that for all we know,
maybe talking during davening is <i>the one thing</i> he does wrong whereas never uttering a word during davening is <i>the one thing </i>we do right.</span><br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";"> </span><span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";"><br /></span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2594202476434232459.post-48157782076442722842012-07-03T15:36:00.000-07:002012-07-03T15:36:16.641-07:00It’s Lowly<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Much of the
loshon hora that is spoken, be it born of ignorance or willful blindness is
fueled by a number of misconceptions as to what is fair game for one’s barbed
tongue. And those misconceptions are
themselves rooted in a serious lack of understanding as to what the laws of
loshon hora are all about.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Rabbi Yitzchak
Berkovits tells us that the prohibition of speaking loshon hora is the Torah’s
way of letting us know that, in addition to not being allowed to damage a
fellow Jew, we are supposed to be a higher people. We are aristocratic, and it is therefore
beneath our dignity to focus on the negative.
Yidden are supposed to exclusively dwell on the positive.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Our attitude as
to what our true focus should be is best illustrated by a vignette from the
Chovos Halevovos in which a </span><span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">rabbi was walking through the street with several
of his students. They came upon the carcass of a dead dog. "What a vile
sight," they remarked. "Look how white its teeth are," responded
the rabbi.</span><span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">But Rabbi Berkovits
goes on to punctuate his thought with a qualifier that goes beyond negativity
to touch the very essence of what loshon hora is all about.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">“Looking for the
negative,” he says, “is something lowly even when it causes no harm. The prohibition is not to do something <i>negative</i>
but rather not to do something <i>lowly</i>.”
If there is a constructive purpose in drawing attention to the negative
at any given time then by definition it’s not lowly, and it may well be
permitted.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">So with the bottom
line feel for the <i>what</i> of loshon hora firmly in hand, what about the
<i>who</i>, as in <i>who</i> does the <i>what</i> apply to?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Everybody.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">You can forget
about all of the popular misconceptions that hold that the laws of loshon hora
don’t apply to certain classes of people because the reality is that there are
no free passes and no stealth rides under the radar. The laws of loshon hora represent a
thoroughly egalitarian framework which allows for no exceptions whatsoever in
which a Yid would be allowed to freely speak loshon hora without having a
positive purpose that would qualify as a proper toellis, irrespective of who was
the object of one’s loshon hora.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">And no
exceptions mean that one can’t freely denigrate non-religious Jews for the same
reason that you can’t talk on religious Jews. It’s lowly. And it’s no less lowly to speak loshon hora on goyim
for no good reason. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">One of the
fundamental principles of the laws of loshon hora, as laid out by the Chofetz
Chaim in his sefer, is that none of the exceptions that would allow someone to
speak loshon hora l’toellis (for a legitimate purpose) apply if the one spoken
about would suffer undue harm, as that may be defined relative to time and
place.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">And Rabbi
Berkovits makes it clear that this rule even includes apikorsim. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Moreover, while
it is most certainly permissible to contrast the differences between a Torah
and an anti-Torah lifestyle for educational purposes, you can’t run down stam
apikorsim by speaking loshon hora about them without any shmeck of toellis just
to have a good time.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Because it’s
still lowly.</span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2594202476434232459.post-3381247919127360792012-06-26T16:43:00.001-07:002012-06-26T16:43:25.165-07:00If You Wouldn’t Say it….<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Rabbi Yossi is
quoted as effectively saying that he wouldn’t say anything about someone that
he wouldn’t say directly to that person himself.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">The fact is that
he never actually said it this way. What
he actually said, as quoted in the Gemara, was that <i>Never once in my life
did I have to retract anything that I said to anyone,</i> but nevertheless, by
wrenching his words totally out of their context a popular misconception has
arisen that assumes that it’s permissible to speak loshon hora if one is
speaking directly to the <i>victim</i> of said loshon hora.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">In the
commentary of the Be’er Mayim Chaim to the first Halacha in Klal Gimmel, the
Chofetz Chaim devotes close to a dozen pages to vaporize this misconception. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">For those
lacking the staying power to attend to the Chofetz Chaim’s detailed and cogent
analysis, the dozen pages of the Be’er Mayim Chayim can be summed up in one
word:</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Fuggedaboutit!</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Like most things
in life, there’s also a flip side to Rabbi Yossi’s words, be they actually
said, be they supposedly said or otherwise, that the Chofetz Chaim didn’t deal
with, and if made into a rule of thumb it would spike the vast majority of
one’s loshon hora from the get go.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Success in
holding the line on loshon hora is a matter of attitude and focus, and if the
attitude is that the laws of loshon hora are an obstacle to one’s desired
discourse then the focus will be on trying to dance around them. Those who
cite, or rather miss cite, Rabbi Yossi do so because they are seeking wiggle
room to say what needn’t be said and more often than not shouldn’t be said
altogether. Those, however, who hearken to the converse of what Rabbi Yossi was purported
to have said focus on Hashem’s desires, as opposed to their own, so as to not
say anything other than what <i>should</i> be said.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">So how can we
slice and dice Rabbi Yossi’s words so as to morph them into verbal body armor?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">It’s a simple
fact of life that most of the baali loshon hora amongst us are not so brazen as
to exercise their tongues in the presence of those who they are attempting to
run down with their speech, and all the more so for the casual speakers of
loshon hora. If one thinks his next door
neighbor is a jerk it’s not likely that he will so express himself when the
neighbor is in hearing range. It’s basic
human nature.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium"; font-size: 14pt;">Therefore,
if you wouldn’t say it in front of yenem don’t say it behind his back. </span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">And if you would?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">For everyone but
the fewest of the arrogant few, who in any case are reading neither this, nor Sefer
Chofetz Chaim, there is no such thing as <i>and if you would</i> because you
wouldn’t.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">The difference
between this statement and that of Rabbi Yossi is small and somewhat subtle,
but bottom line it’s all the difference in the world.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">If one
internalizes these fifteen words, then ninety per cent of the loshon hora
scenarios that one would normally encounter in his war with the Yetzer Hora
will be removed from the battlefield.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">It’s simplicity
itself.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">There are no
conditions and rules to remember and no inferences to be drawn. At the end of the day there’s nothing but these
fifteen words standing between you and ninety percent of all of the loshon hora
that you would otherwise speak over the course of the rest of your life.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">It’s as simple
and as difficult as that. </span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2594202476434232459.post-84210750181178257552012-06-19T16:00:00.000-07:002012-06-19T16:00:24.961-07:00You Can’t Believe a Word of it<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Shemiras
HaLoshon is in today.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">The words,
Shemiras HaLoshon, that is. What those
words are meant to represent can be quite another story.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Did you ever
notice that there are several halachas listed in Sefer Chofetz Chaim that tend
to be generally ignored, as if by prior agreement, with the majority of Klal
Yisroel in on the conspiracy?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Who has not
witnessed, at least once in his life, not to mention the more likely scenario
of dozens of times, if not more, the trashing of a people of impeccable
character, including great rabbis who were universally considered to be great
tzaddikim with usually only the speaker’s camp, group, sect, or whatever, opting
out of the adulation?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">And speaker
wise, (re: the baali loshon hora), we’re not talking pygmies here. Many of them are great men in their own
right, and the information that they are giving over they in turn heard from
the lips of other great men.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">So what gives
here anyway?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Most, if not all
of it that’s not actually out right slander (motzi shem ra) is spoken under the
rubric of toellis (speech that is necessary for a specific purpose). One avails himself of this heter, as per the
guidelines laid out in Sefer Chofetz Chaim, so as to make known something that
would be important for the listener to hear, such as negative information
concerning a shidduch or perhaps a potential business partnership.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">The truth is
that one man’s tzaddik can be another’s apikoris, so given the elasticity of
the heter of toellis where the line between objective and subjective necessity
of one’s words tends to get subconsciously blurred, it would be more productive
to shift our focus elsewhere.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">We said above
that <i>many of them are great men in their own right, and the information that
they are giving over they in turn heard from the lips of other great men.</i> While everyone and his uncle who has a
negative comment to make about someone will do their best to morph their words
into pristine examples of speech bursting forth with positive purpose, if what
they are saying <i>they in turn heard from the lips of others</i> then they
have a serious problem.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Where exactly is
the heter that would permit one to believe this stuff?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">It may be all
fine and dandy to either actually sanitize one’s negative comments under the
ultra-violet exception of toellis or to fool oneself into thinking that he did,
but neither scenario is going to fly in the realm of being mekabel (accepting)
someone else’s words because what most of us forgot, or maybe never knew, or better yet don’t want to know, is that there is no mention anyplace in Sefer Chofetz Chaim
of any kind of heter to be mekabel loshon hora l’toellis. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">What this means
in English is that you can’t believe anything you are told about anyone for any
reason whatsoever, and if doesn’t concern you in some way you can’t even listen
to it. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Unlike the
speaking of loshon hora, there’s no wiggle room here on the mekabel end within
which to drey. So how is it that so many
of us seem to be running on what amounts to permanent chutzpah cruise control in the realm of believing loshon hora that more often than not we shouldn't even be listening to in the first place ?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">When we said <i>that
you can’t believe anything you are told about anyone for any reason whatsoever</i>,
we omitted to mention that there two exceptions to this no, nada, nicht, never
rule of being mekabel loshon hora, which is that if a person is an established
apikoris or a rasha then you are allowed to believe what’s said about him.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">And these are
the only exceptions, so we ask again in reference to those who are mekabel
loshon hora about our great rabbis and other upstanding people:</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Where’s the heter?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Could it be that
the taiva to speak loshon hora is so great that they have to morph tzaddikim, </span><span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">with which they have disagreements that amount to no more than chaluki
deos (differences of opinion), into apikorsim just to be able to speak
about them?</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">How can one posit such a possibility?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";"></span><span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Great rabbis or
just plain fine upstanding Jews are exactly that. What you see is what you get. It isn’t likely that one would find any of
them doubling as apikorsim or reshoim on their night job. And it’s just as unlikely that you’ll ever
encounter an exception to the rule that forbids you to be mekabel loshon hora
from someone. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">What we are looking at here is simply gross ignorance of the Halacha that is unfortunately not limited to the ignorant.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">There are a
number of exceptions to many of the rules laid down in Sefer Chofetz Chaim, and
many of those exceptions have to run a gauntlet of five or sometimes even seven
conditions. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">This isn’t one
of them. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">The Halacha of
not believing loshon hora that’s told to you is about as clear as things get
vis á vis the laws of loshon hora. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">You can’t
believe a word of it.</span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2594202476434232459.post-78077653876234905882012-06-12T15:15:00.000-07:002012-07-10T14:24:07.688-07:00The Clarity of Context<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">In the wonderful
world of average people a.k.a. our world, we the people, the Beinonim who
occupy the great center that fills in the divide between the Tzaddikim from the
Reshoim all tend to stumble in very similar ways.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Whatever you see
your neighbor do you also did once upon a time or may well do tomorrow with but
a slight variation on the theme, not enough to take it out of whatever aveira
was the touchstone between your two neshamos at different points in time.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">So why is it that
there is a Grand Canyon disconnect between the understanding with which you
view your actions and the jaundiced eye that you cast upon the missteps of
your friend, sufficient to ignite within you a desire to talk about it?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">When assessing
the doings of our friend we have nothing in front of us but the bare bones of
undefined actions which by themselves are meaningless without the benefit of
the what, why and who of the matter. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Where’s that
back story that would flesh out the possible motivation for whatever it was
that ran afoul your perception of right and wrong? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Better yet, what
happened to the mitzvah aseh of <i>one must love his fellow Jew as he loves
himself?</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">The Chofetz
Chaim tells us that <i>someone who speaks loshon hora or gossips about a fellow
Jew, or someone who listens to these remarks and accepts them as the truth, even
if the remarks are truthful, clearly demonstrates that he has no love at all
for his fellow Jew and most certainly not fulfilling his obligation from the
Torah “to love your fellow Jew as you love yourself.”</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">But by us, by
our faults, foibles, speed bumps, and sometimes blatant aveiros, it’s a
different story because when we shine the light on our less than gallant doings
we dust off a different pair of eyes of a somewhat softer variety.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">The irony of
course is that while we are only privy to a mere smattering of our friend’s
left turns, the complete and very detailed accounting of our own rebelliousness
against what the Torah demands of us is constantly in our face. Given the enormity of our debit balance in
contradistinction to the little we know of our friend’s red ink, how is it
possible for our eye (and then tongue) to be drawn in the direction of our
friend’s weaknesses?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">The Chofetz
Chaim lets us know that <i>even though we are aware of our many sins, far more
than have been disclosed about our friend, we push them all aside because we
love ourselves. </i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">We are more
accepting of ourselves because we possess the clarity that comes from being
cognizant of the context from which all of our mistakes flow, which in turn
enhances our understanding of all of our shortcomings. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">In keeping with
the mitzvah of “love your fellow Jew as yourself, <i>the Torah demands that we
deal with our fellow Jew in exactly the same manner, to zealously guard and
protect his honor and interests to the best of our abilities.</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">And this can
only happen if his comings and goings are assessed within their natural
context. Then and only then can we obtain
the clarity necessary to see ourselves in him.</span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2594202476434232459.post-20215584927527339262012-06-09T18:52:00.000-07:002012-06-11T07:21:09.596-07:00Don’t Even Think About It<br />
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">You know how it
is.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">We see someone
do or say something that we don’t approve of, and right away he’s guilty of
whatever it is we’re charging him with in our minds. We didn’t (at least this time) make a
derogatory comment about it to anyone, nor were we mekabel this negative
inference from yenem.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Neither saying nor
hearing anything leaves us squeaky clean on our ride</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">under the radar
as far as the laws of loshon hora are concerned. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">Our thoughts,
however, are a different story because as we explained in </span><a href="http://emunahspeak.blogspot.com/2012/01/nothing-but-thoughts.html">EmunahSpeak:
Nothing but Thoughts</a>:</div>
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<i><span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">You are what
you think. </span> </i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">We were speaking
there in relation to character traits and we went on to point out that <i>If
his (a person’s) thoughts were saturated with humility it would be physically
IMPOSSIBLE for him to conduct himself in an arrogant manner. And so it is
for every other midda, be it positive or negative.</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">And the same can
be said even for certain mitzvos.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">In the
introduction to Sefer Chofetz Chaim the Chofetz Chaim lists 17 Laveen (negative
mitzvos) and 14 Aseen (positive mitzvos) that one might potentially violate by
either speaking or believing loshon hora.
While most of these mitzvos are not about loshon hora per se in their
essence, the Chofetz Chaim tells us that when ones crosses the line on loshon
hora he may also be violating one or more of these Aseen or Laveen.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">But most of them
are also violated without even uttering a word of loshon hora.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">If someone is
speaking loshon hora is he not, as was also said there, simply <i>reading his
lines; the lines that he has written for himself; the ones etched into his
thoughts? </i> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">If you said it,
you first thought it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">And if you
thought it, then even if you’re a tzaddik who kept his mouth shut in the
aftermath of the judge and jury role playing that was outlined above, and you
didn’t tell your wife, your co-worker or your best buddy what you saw or heard,
you have to know that you’re a tzaddik who might already be in big trouble
because you may have trashed the Aseh of <i>judge your fellow Jew charitably.</i> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">And that’s
before you even opened your mouth. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">So it all comes
down to this:</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Albertus Medium";">If you really
want to control your tongue you have to first learn to control your mind because
if you’re not already thinking about something that shouldn’t be there then it’s
impossible that you should be speaking about it.</span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com